Saturday, February 20, 2021

#51 / Worst Films Ever


It is well known that the coronavirus pandemic has resulted in LOTS more movie binge watching. Forbes, for instance, not only provides us with the picture above, but gives us this report: 

There was a lot of binge-watching of documentaries, reality TV and romance. Stories that took place outside the U.S. also saw some of the largest gains as viewers were stuck at home and isolated. Through entertainment, we sought love, escapism and connection with others.

Streaming movies as an escape from the realities of the pandemic lockdown? That is a real thing! Some have utilized the Hallmark channel, or have even punched the buttons for UpTV, trying to find some "feel good" movies in these dismaying times. While I am sure the "feel good" channels are attractive to many, Netflix has probably been the big winner in the lockdown competition. In April of last year, as the pandemic shutdown began, BBC News reported that Netflix had signed up sixteen million more customers. I was already signed up, and still am, but I like to think I can resist the siren call of streaming movies. Books, right? If you are bored and feeling restive, you could just read a book! I tell myself that, but I must confess that I am not immune from the urge felt by millions to escape the boring realities of our stay-at-home pandemic by losing myself in one or more of the rapidly expanding set of Netflix offerings.

Just yesterday, for instance, I advertised what I thought was a truly excellent movie, My Octopus Teacher. I found it on Netflix, more or less by chance. I absolutely recommend it. However, not all my selections have been winners. 

Blood Money, for instance (no longer on Netflix) might well qualify for a "worst films ever" list. The movie was made in 2017, and stars John Cusack, who does just fine. The movie, though (click for the trailer), is really not fine. Lots of money falls out of the sky, and greed prevails. The lust for money prevails over love and common decency, and you're not happy with the ending. At least I wasn't. Don't watch it! That's my advice. Consider this to be a public service announcement! 

Even worse than Blood Money is The Paramedic (El Practicante), which is described by Wikipedia as a 2020 Spanish thriller film. I didn't find it all that thrilling, and would characterize it, rather, as a portrait of an unrelievedly horrible person - horrible from the beginning, and horrible after he is turned into a paraplegic early in the film, and horrible when he is ultimately turned into a vegetable, pushed around in a wheelchair by a pregnant woman he has tortured throughout the film. Do you remember what I said about Blood Money? Double up for this one. If I haven't discouraged you enough, you can click this link for the trailer, but you should really make that trailer the last contact you ever have with this film. I mean it!

This is a public service announcement!

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